Response to Slaughter's "Why Women Still Can't Have It All"

The only thing I hate more than a career panel* is a career panel that focuses on work-life balance.  I go to them looking for sage wisdom from the lawyers-with-lives who came before me.  But, they are inevitably attended only by women and cater to women because women are supposedly the only ones who care about this topic. 

Similarly, I really want to like Anne-Marie Slaughter's "Why Women Still Can't Have it All."    

I want to like it because I really hope to be one of those women who have to struggle with the oh-so-difficult problem of whether to stay in my awesome, time-consuming, high-powered job, or go back to my awesome, less time-consuming, professionally-satisfying job.  I am glad she gives the nod to the fact that there are many factors to the problem.  I heart that she realizes that her view is mostly a rich, white lady view of a much larger problem of having a life while paying the bills for people of all income levels, genders, stages of life, and in all industries.  

But I am so tired of this being structured as a women's issue.

I get it.  The way society is set up means that most of the time women do end up the only ones that have to worry about this topic.  Even when the topic of men's work-life balance is brought up, it is done is a poorly-executed way like the May 2012 Forbes article, "Real Men Don't Need Work Life Balance."   These articles aren't actually saying that women are they ones that have all the options and men are the ones who have it rough, but it certainly comes across that way.

The solution that the career panels I attend and these articles profer run in two veins.  The first is:  change the work environment through hard work and perserverence.  I will call this the Slaughter Approach.  She advocates for talking a lot about your kids and about going home to dinner so it will normalize flexible schedules.  But then she goes on to say that she works on nights and weekends in order to get stuff done, much like the "super women" she said are outside the realm of what is posible for most of us.  She also implies that you have to be a woman in power to make changes, which does very little to help me now, as I am not (yet) a woman in power.

The second vein is: have a supportive partner.  That's great and all, but what if I don't want a partner?  What if he or she wants to have a high powered job, too?  Gloria Steinem is famous for saying that she didn't need a husband so much as she needed a wife.  A high powered job takes an army of support staff to make everything work.  If you want that life, you either have to hire a nanny or ask your partner to take one for the (family) team.  Doesn't that seem like throwing out the old chauvenism for the new feminist kind?

I would really like to see a new approach that writes articles for high-powered men titled, "Go Play with Your Kids and Stop Worrying About Putting Yet More Bacon on the Table."  And articles for bosses called, "Require Employees to Leave at 5pm."  And articles for society called, "Increase Social Benefits so Normal (not-so-rich) People Can Have Work-Life Balance, Too."  Or even one called, "Family Planning and Better Daycare So I Can Be a Career Woman Without Kids If I Wanna Be."

This is a multi-faceted problem that is not going to be solved by women alone.  I wish we could stop talking about it that way.

------
*I promise to rant more about career panels someday soon.

Some things I'm Reading

From CNN Health: The Battle Over Housework Breeds Stress.  With perception of inequality in the relationship seen as a major factor.  Duh.

From Time Healthland: Why Most Mothers Don't Meet Their Own Breast-Feeding Goals.  Interesting article on the barriers to mothers meeting their breast feeding goals.  FYI: the CDC and WHO encourage exclusive breastfeeding for six months and continued breastfeeding in addition to other foods for as long as possible.

News coverage on new study from the University of Adelaide: Earlier Birth is Best for Twins.  This one scares the bejesus out of me.  The study suggests that an elected birth at 37 weeks is best for twins.  According to the Cochrane Summaries (an organization that reviews medical procedures to see if their are evidence-based), the evidence is really inconclusive, but articles like this one make it sound like fact.  Also, it is really hard to tell the actual gestational age.  That means you could deliver a baby you think is 37 weeks but be off by a couple...and with babies' lungs the last thing to develop, there could be serious ramifications. I'm obviously concerned.

43 Thousand Emails

When presented with a seemingly Terrible Task, you know -- are just positively sure -- that there has to be a less terrible way of doing it.  There is no way on Earth that you are the first person presented with this particular Terrible Task. 

More importantly that person who came before you OBVIOUSLY took the time to figure out an easier way of doing it and then kindly documented it online for the next poor soul presented with the Terrible Task.

Right?  Please?  Somebody?  No?  Crap.

For future generations of those asked to do Terrible Tasks, let me document this for you:  HOW TO SORT THROUGH 43,000 EMAILS WITHOUT CRYING

1. Skip the panicking, the call to the help desk, the desperate reading of the Outlook Help Guide (which will be infuriatingly vague).  Skip the Googling random email-related terms in hopes that someone else had figured out how to do this before you.  I've done all that for you.
2. Go to www.x1.com and download the software (if you can't get your work to buy you the program, just use the trial version).
3. Read their three-page tutorial.
4. The tutorial doesn't mention that it is easier if you import the emails into your outlook first (instead of searching them as files).  It will save you an hour.  Just thought you should know. 
5. Perform the search that you have been requested to do and narrow the emails down to a more manageable number.
6. You are now the master of all that is on your computer.  You are basically magic.

Now you will have 1,300 emails.  Which is way less than 43,000.  Inevitably, you will want to dance a little at this point.  You will be expecting someone to refer to you as "The Miracle Worker" and offer to buy you lunch at the food truck across the street. 

At this point, they will ask you to PDF all 1,300 emails. 

And so an added bonus:  HOW TO PDF 1,300 EMAILS WITHOUT HAVING TO DO THEM ONE BY ONE*

1. Skip the hour-long phone call with the help desk.  And the sinking feeling in your stomach when the experts have to escalate it to their boss who has to escalate it to their boss who still is stumped at first.  And the pleading that PDF isn't that cool of a format and who wants to read a PDF anyway?  You can skip that, too.  I did all that for you.
2. Create a .pst folder in your Outlook.
3. Drag all the emails into it that you want to pdf.  
4. Right click on the folder and then click "create pdf."
5. Create portfolio.  It is easier to read/manage than individual pdfs.
6. Pretend like you had to pdf them one by one, freeing yourself up for an afternoon of Words With Friends.**

You are welcome.

-------
*I'm sorry if this only works in Outlook 2010 and you don't have 2010.  That would suck.
**For the record, I've never played WWF in my life.

Plain Writing Act of 2010

I was asked to put together a presentation for senior staff on the agency's obligations under the Plain Writing Act of 2010.  It basically requires the government to write documents for public consumption that the public can actually consume.  Emphasis is placed on short, easy-to-read sentences and friendly, what-up-girl phrasing.

I enjoy this Act so much for its straight-faced irony.  It uses ten (or fifty) words to say what could be said in five.  It refers back to other paragraphs in the same document (forcing you to go back and reread) instead of just telling to what you need to know.  In addition, there is a six page guidance from OMB referring to a 118 page guidance from the PLAIN Committee tasked with implementing this plan.

Here is my favorite piece of guidance demonstrating the way to write more clearly (version 2 is supposed to be the correct version):

Oh, sentences ending in a preposition.  You just can't make this stuff up.*

Anyhoo . . . In order to create my presentation for senior staff, I looked up my agency's point-person for implementing the Act.  I drafted a nice email (making sure it was in plain language) asking for information I could use.  Reread it for content.  Ran spell check.  Sent it off to the correct person.

And as I hit send, my short little intern life flashed before my eyes.  I had just committed a grievous error and I realized it too late.

The point person for these types of things is usually a VERY high level person, but the actual work is usually handled by their staff.  That's why there is often a general email address associated with government actions like this one.  So basically, an intern (read: me) sent a polite yet rather inappropriate email to a very high level individual.  Whoops.

I called her staffer: "Um, I'm an intern and I messed up"

"How much did you mess up?"

"Only a little bit."

"Oh, do tell."

"I sent and email to [the official].  Can you fix my mistake for me, dear sir?"

And the staffer thrice pounded his head on his desk and thought so loudly to himself that I could hear it resonate from his brain through the phone, "God, I hate intern season."**

---
*Actually, my dad and I get in fights over this grammar rule fairly frequently (yes, my family is strange).  The Grammar Girl clarifies when it is ok to end a sentence with a preposition.  I would argue that this is not one of those time.

**And then he did, indeed, fix my mistake and send me some very informative materials.  And was totally pleasant doing it.  Thanks, dear sir!

Interning Again

I am in the ridiculous position of being back in DC as an intern after several years of full-time employment.  I am also back at the same agency I was at previously being paid a very handsome wage to do much of what I am now doing for an intern's stipend (not that I am complaining THAT loudly....many of my colleagues are not being remunerated for their efforts this summer).

The real problem?  I am 26, which in intern years is like inviting your mother to your kegger.  Generally, I am pleased that I pass as an employee among my former co-workers, but among the interns, I become THAT intern as described by the Washington Post.  I thinking owning a full contingency of suits/work-appropriate clothing really gives me away.

Actually, the post did another article about the phenomenon of older interns.  I think we are getting more respect (pity?) in this iffy economic climate.

In any case, restarting this blog in order to talk about my experiences as the Girl Intern, Part Deux.  Will still continue to blog about knitting over at Ambitious Knits.

"You Are NOT Normal"

Sitting in a classroom on a Sunday learning about targeting and media markets, working 18 hour work days and having fun doing it, getting excited about budgeting and fundraising. Not things the average American would get caught doing....the trainers keep trying to remind us this periodically: "You are NOT normal!" The average voter doesn't give a hoot about all this politics crap. And yet, I am immersed in it constantly, obsessively. And I am supposed to be the one able to talk to the voters....

Tomorrow I have to make my decision about my top choices for campaigns. I am still unsure what I am qualified to do, so I am just going to make a few random choices (sorry, mom, except for a race in IA, I think I am going to avoid the Midwest...too much snow) and let fate take its course. We have been way too busy for me to do the level of research that I wanted to do. But I trust that EMILY's List did a great job of choosing these races.

Today we met Ellen Malcolm. She is the founder and current president of EMILY's List. Not sure if you are familiar with the history of EMILY's List, but basically, Ellen and her friends thought that it would be easier to elect women candidates if they could fundraise earlier. Early fundraising makes big money donaters like PACs see that they are viable candidates and makes them want to give more money to help them win. So Ellen and her friends asked their friends to make small donations to pro-choice women candidates. They bundled these checks together, sent them to candidates, and together raised more than $300,000 for two women candidates and electing the first democratic woman to the senate in her own right. Rdiculously cool. This group became EMILY's List.

Today we also went to the EMILY's List headquarters for a reception with the staff. Good food. HUGE beautiful office. They certainly have plenty of money and it was exciting to see so many people dedicated to helping women in politics. It gives me much hope.

I am getting along well with my campaign team. They are fantastic people (although mostly Obama supporters....oh Hillary....) and really fun to work with. We created a fantastic attack direct mail piece calling George Bush a monkey. If I can figure out how to post it to the web, I will show it to you.

This is the first night in what seems like an eternity that I can get to bed before midnight so I should prolly take advantage of that. Write me an email or something. I need to talk about anything other than politics.

What's $500 Anyway?

So I wrote my first campaign budget today. It is pretty ridiculously bad from a I-know-what-I'm-doing-so-don't-worry-that-you-put-me-in-charge standpoint, but at least I know enough about campaigning after today to be able to know that it is bad. Mostly it is fun to throw around a few hundred/thousand/hundred thousand dollars like nothing. Fake money is fun to spend. Earning it will be the difficult part, I guess.

This morning, a lifetime ago, we started with campaign planning, followed by budgeting. Then we got to meet with our teams to staff our campaign. I have been designated communications director as well as the candidate whenever she is supposed to speak or be on posters. Not sure if voters would elect a girl with slightly pinkish-when-in-the-right-light hair as a state rep, but I guess we will find out. This afternoon we were introduced to fundraising, and then...DUN DUN DUUUUUNNNNN!!!!....

We found out about the campaigns that we could be assigned to. There are only a few congressional races, mostly state legislative races. Some working for state Democratic committees. They are all women candidates. The states range from Iowa to Florida to Washington. I have my work cut out for me ranking them by Wednesday. Do I want to be one of only two staffers on a state legislative race? I would get to do amazingly cool things, but it would be on a small level. Or work on a US House race and have less power over the direction of the campaign, but do equally (and maybe more so) amazingly cool things? Ack!

In the meantime, I am sooooo hungry. TDR food is just not working for me, but I think that's because there is no protein containing foods that look edible. So it is peanut butter and scrambled eggs for breakfast tomorrow. Followed by fundraising. Lots and lots of fundraising.